The 10 Texts That Keep Romance Alive
Romance is fucking real ya’ll.
It turns out I just didn’t know it until I married the best man on the planet.
My husband and I are pukey: I understand this as an objective fact. I’m also okay with it. At any given moment, my phone is filled with romantic text after romantic text from my husband – and so is his from me.
Because of the new direction of The LITMO Life, and because of my incredible excitement to get going, here’s my first new favorite post about love: the 10 most romantic texts I my husband and I send to each other every week.
1. The “I Can’t Wait” Text
“I can’t WAIT for Imagine!”
“I am sooooo stoked for our trip!”
“I can’t wait to get to kiss you next.”
These are actual texts I have sent to my husband.
The “I Can’t Wait” text is something I love to send to him, because I believe all experiences happen through three major elements: anticipation, experience, and recall (more on that below and more on that to come in another blog).
Anticipating an event is part of the major fun of it. Think about Christmas when you were a kid: how far in advance did you start marking your calendar? As adults, we forget that anticipating something adds a layer to its experience.
So when my husband and I are planning something fun and sexy, whether it’s a music festival or just a planned night at home for drinking wine and having sex, I like to build up the anticipation as much as I can by talking about it a lot.
And it works, every time, to heighten the experience.
2. The “Remember When” Text
“Remember that time that we pulled into the bank parking lot to have sex…” (<— Actual text I’ve sent to my husband).
“Remember our wedding night…”
“Wasn’t that concert one of the best things we’ve done lately?”
The “Remember When” text is just like the anticipation text, except it’s the last stage of experience: recall. I love continuing the experience of something good by reminding my husband (and myself) of it. Sometimes I even do the recall part through a conversation, just sitting on a couch with him reliving a fun memory.
It definitely helps remind us that we aren’t old and boring, on those nights that we are just sitting around, and it continues to bond us over our great experience.
3. The “What If We” Text
“What if we went to bar and pretended to be strangers and hit on each other?”
“What if we got naked and pushed boundaries tonight?”
That “what if we” text is one of the most insanely fun texts I send to my husband because it sparks our imagination for things we’d like to do. I like to think of dirty, sexy, fun, outrageous, you-name-it things that I might like to try in the future and send this information to my husband at the most random times.
I find that it turns me on, it turns him on, and often, it’s something we end up doing. Win-win-win.
4. The “I Miss You” Text
It’s true: I have a big need for personal space in a relationship. And my husband gets this, so we try to make it a point to do solo activities along with couples activities.
That said, none of that means I don’t miss him like crazy.
Often, as soon as I’ve lefft the house, I’ll send him an “I miss you” text. And when he’s at work? Forget it, I’m basically pestering him with GIFs that say “I miss you” all day.
Because I DO miss him! I recognize that to be a healthy individual in a healthy couple, we can’t be together 24/7. But that doesn’t mean I can’t continue to let my husband know how much I love him when we’re not together.
I do, and he loves it!
5. The “I Appreciate You” Text
“You are the best husband in the world.” (<– I send this to my husband MULTIPLE times a day.)
“Thank you for stopping to get the chocolate.”
“I am so lucky to be your wife.”
I think my husband is the best man in the entire world and I always feel super grateful that I get to KNOW him, let alone be his wife.
And I know he feels that same way about me. Because of this, we’re constantly blowing up each other’s phones with how wonderful we think the other is and how appreciative we are of our life together.
I’ve been in relationships before where I never really said thank you. A lot of that is because I can be a douche (it’s true) but a lot of it is just because I wasn’t with The One person that was made for me. When Jonathon and I connected, it just made sense and I always wanted him to know how much I appreciate him.
It’s a romantic text that not only helps keep the spark alive, but it’s just a nice thing to send and receive.
6. The “Sext” Text
This one should be self-explanatory. When you get married, that doesn’t mean you have to stop dating and hitting on each other!
I hit on my husband several times a day, both in person and via text. The sext could be a naked picture of me or it could be me sending a suggestive GIF or it could be me literally texting, “Hey, wanna get it on in the shower when you get home?”
Although we do have an active sex life because we both have a high sex drive (we set a “for jokes” goal of having sex once a day for the entirety of our married life but it turned out we didn’t need to set that goal because it was more like two or three times a day that one of us felt the need to have the other immediately), it’s also fun AF to keep the heat going when we’re not physically together.
The sext is one of my favorites.
7. The “Compliment” Text
“You’re perfect.”
“I’m so proud of you.”
“You are the cutest!”
These are all texts I’ve sent to my husband within the last 5 days. There’s nothing like a good compliment to boost the ego a bit, but also, these are all true things I feel about him, so why would I keep it to myself?
I legitimately think my husband is the hottest, handsomest, kindest, hardest-working, most perfect man in the entire world. And I know he thinks I’m the prettiest, smartest, sweetest, most loving woman in the entire world. So we blow each other up with compliments, because why not? It’s what people do in the early stages of dating, and we want to keep that love and romance throughout our married life.
8. The “I Can’t Believe” Text
“Did you know my last name is Nowakowski!?”
“We went to high school together!”
“We’re MARRIED!”
These are all actual things I’ve said to my husband, as well. Sometimes, I just get totally overwhelmed with the reality that is my amazing life: in a “job” I love, working for myself, doing what I want, not answering to anyone, and having found The One, when I didn’t even believe The One existed before!
When I get overwhelmed in these moments, I share it with my husband, especially when it’s about him! Sure, our courtship was faster than most but still, even if we had had a more traditional romantic timeline, I would stilll be overwhelmed with getting to be married to the best man in the world.
So I tell him. A lot! And it helps keep our relationship full of energy and excitement.
9. The “Joke” Text
I always say to Jonathon that it’s funny we’ll never have kids because he’s so good at dad jokes.
The “Joke” text is one that Jonathon and I send back and forth to each other a lot. He loves dad jokes and cheesy puns and I love lame ass pick-up lines (“what’s a guy like you doin in a place like this….” sent while standing in our kitchen).
This type of text reminds us both that our relationship is about FUN. Too often, people get married or in other serious relationships and just start adulting – talking about bills and schedules and obligations and shit.
We don’t do that. We have fun, first and foremost. Our marriage is a partnership between besties, before anything else, and with some hot sex thrown in, we both feel like we have the best relationship in the world.
10. The “I Love You” Text
This one is fairly self-explanatory. 🙂 Sometimes, for no reason at all, you just have to tell your partner you love them. I do it to my husband probably way more often than needed, but the truth is, sometimes I’m just totally overwhelmed with love for him for no reason at all – other than that he’s perfect!
A simple “I love you” text will go a long way to make your partner’s day and make them super excited for the next time they see you.
These are the texts my husband and I send each other on a regular basis. I didn’t start to go through a checklist or categorization of texts, of course, they are just the ones I find myself sending (and receiving) most regularly that keep our spark hot and kicking! <3